Thursday, October 13, 2016

What am I doing here?

What am I doing here?
I fail to see the point of sitting in an uncomfortable desk
surrounded by cinderblock walls no windows, closed doors.
Given readings, given homework, worksheets
the means of which I'll never have a use for
and everyone beside me seems to excel
and my worth is determined on whether I pass or fail.
Am I not cut out for this cookie cutter system
or am I trapped in an institution stuck in the past
am I the victim?
If I leave will I be labeled as a slacker?
Could I even get a job as a burger stacker?
Why am I born into debt,
To who?
To my country?
I'm only 18 with adult responsibility
And I'll never get anywhere with a lack of cash
And following my heart would damn me to lower class
The disappointment I would see
in my parents
With no job opportunities and an inability
to pay rent
Do I kill myself trying to make them proud
Break my spirit just to make ends meet
and if I get what I want will it actually
taste sweet?
I'm not made to be a robot
no perfect circuitry
I must have blown a fuse
That's just not me
So tell me how it came to this
Why I'm shoved into this mold
Cause an unhappiness like this
(like our system)
is getting kind of old.

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